18 Aug

4 New Etiquette Rules for the Modern Couple

Something borrowed, something blue. Something old, something new. Between traditions of years past, most familiar to parents and grandparents, to new trends and traditions emerging for today’s modern couple, it’s easy to see a major transformation in historical wedding etiquette. With any change to tradition, there are usually a few bumps along the way to trying something new, including bumping a few heads with those that may not agree. Although the landscape may be changing, that doesn’t mean there aren’t any rules – it just means they look a lot different than they used to.

Making the Announcement
It’s a digital world and sending a tweet is a lot easier than sending a letter, but it’s just not the same for your most cherished loved ones to read about your engagement on Facebook or see the photo of your ring on Instagram. Your family wants to hear you say it yourself, either in person or over a phone call. Share your exciting news with your closest relatives before you tell the world in 140 characters or less.


Photography: Susanna Tanner

Split the Bill
Weddings can be extremely expensive. Antiquated tradition puts all the financial pressure on the bride’s family, but for any modern couple – this just doesn’t do. It’s polite for the groom’s family to offer to split the costs between their families. This can be done in a few different ways whether it is the groom’s family pays for their own guests, or the groom’s family covers the cost of significant items like rehearsal dinner, entertainment, transportation, etc. Also, the couple chips in! It’s not unheard of for couples to help pay for a portion of their own wedding day.


Photography: SB Childs Photography

Know When to Say No
You don’t have to invite everyone on your parent’s address book. Remember, guest count is the most important number you’ll encounter during wedding planning. Think about the size of the wedding you’re comfortable having (and what is realistically affordable) and be selective in who you choose to invite. It’s important to sit down with everyone you want to involve in your planning and be upfront and honest – inviting a relative you don’t know and haven’t seen since you were 9 years old may not make the cut.


Photography: Summerly Photography


Think Outside the Gifting Box
The modern couple are usually individuals that have already lived on their own or lived together for a while and already have the typical household items people traditionally purchase as wedding gifts. So, it’s perfectly okay to ask for unique, nontraditional items. Some couples even opt to asking their guests to contribute to their honeymoon in lieu of an actual gift.


Photography: Lumatic Images

Go Ahead and Take  a Look

It used to be that the bride and groom couldn’t see one another before the wedding. After the rehearsal dinner they would part, not to see one another until the bride was walking down the aisle. While it’s grown popular over the last few years, having a ‘first look’ is a new modern tradition that gives the soon-to-be wed couple and special few minutes together before their wedding ceremony. This private time allows them to cool their nerves, stand in awe of one another, and snap a couple photos of just how excited they are for what is about to come.

Whatever your style, taste or special interests are, there’s no reason not to incorporate them into your wedding. It’s your day, so why not make it as you as you possibly can? Out with the old, in with the new? Or something old, something new?

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